Buck up, little soldier…

Hello all!

It’s been an age since I’ve made a post, hasn’t it. My blog reading and commenting have been pretty lean, too. Many of my favorite bloggers are on IG, but even though that’s so fast and easy, I haven’t commented much there either. But I digress…

My world has been rocked a bit lately. I hadn’t planned to share, but since I always appreciate hearing everyone else’s back stories and knowing that they’re ok when absent for a while, it seemed the logical step.

So here we go. You likely know that my 91-year mother lives with us. Mom lost a kidney a few years ago due to sepsis from a hospital visit while she still lived in California. Her remaining kidney had very little functionality, and it was declared that she probably would be with us only a “few more months, certainly not a year”. She lived on another three years there, and has been here with us over a year and a half – I’d say she has definitely beat the odds on that one!

During the last few weeks, however, there’s been a decline in her general well being. I’ve been doing more for her and watching her become increasingly dependent. My normally chipper mother has lost some of her sparkle. She has more aches and pains, sleeps more, eats less and has lost a little weight (we rejoiced to see her finally reach 105 lbs, so this loss is not welcome). Her kidney function has fluctuated, other key lab tests have been wonky, and she’s had a bout of dehydration. It’s a delicate and difficult balancing act.

To bring a long story short, her doctor believes she has turned a corner in her life, and it may be time to consider hospice services. Not because she is actively dying (isn’t that the oddest expression), but to keep her comfortable, and most important, keep her here at home. And yet again, we hear the prognosis of “months, certainly not a year”. That may be the case, or she may surprise us once again! How I’d love to be surprised, in spite of what my eyes are trying to tell me.

So why did I decide to share this? As a means of explaining my absence, of course, since some have inquired, but also to begin my own healing. A way of forcing myself to push through. My sewing blog buddy, soon to be in-person buddy, someone a lot of you know (… it’s Del!! …) sent an email that inspired me. “Saw your sweet list on IG a few days ago… ” 

I had to go back and read my “sweet” list. It was a tad maudlin. I was obviously missing my children, worried about my mom, perhaps having just a bit of a pity party, certainly not the light-hearted post I intended. One listed item was that Mom taught me to sew on her Bernina. Now I have my own Bernina, and would like Mom to see that those long-ago lessons were not wasted. So as she takes more and longer naps, I’ll have some time to myself and intend to use at least part of it to do some sewing again! I have one project nearly finished and a few lined up. More on that in the next post.

That’s it for today, friends, thanks for reading … and Stitch On, Everyone!




23 thoughts on “Buck up, little soldier…

  1. Thank you for sharing. We may be miles away but it makes no difference to friendship and caring about each other. It’s lovely that you have had some special time with your mum in your own home and she will have noticed the teachings she passed to you in crafting and caring. You will all know when it’s time to have help in caring and know that you are not alone. There is always someone here to have an exchange with. Sending you virtual hugs. Be kind to yourself K xXx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. {{{hugs}}} Thank you for sharing. You and your mum are in my prayers. Keep pushing through but don’t forget to pause and catch up. Take time for some selfcare too. What a blessing these sweet memories are.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you for such kind words, Lovely One! There’s a card in the mail to you today, so keep an eye peeled. 😉 Am glad to see you reaching out to our lovely sewing community. We all send you loving support and thoughts. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It is so difficult to share these personal stories in such an honest way – as you have done here. Thank you for letting us all know of these concerns and commitments you have right now. Your mom sounds like a wonderful person. She is so fortunate to have you for her daughter! I wish you both strength and calm for whatever lies ahead. And – I hope you can do some sewing!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I can’t believe it was a year and a half ago you were preparing to have your Mum come and live with you – I remember the posts where you were getting your home ready to welcome her. As you know, my own mother is ill now but I can’t be with her all the time as you are with yours – both situations are hard in their own way. You are in my thoughts Jen and I wish you all the physical and emotional strength you will need now and in the coming months and don’t forget to take care of yourself too. xx

    Liked by 1 person

  6. My heart goes out to you, as I watch my own Mum decline {Alzheimer’s} and I am her full time sole carer. It is probably the hardest thing any of us will ever have to do. I’ve added you both to my distance healing list, sending light and love to you, your Mom, and all who care for and help. Remember ~ take care of yourself! {not that I take my own advice!} xo

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  7. Such a difficult time for you Jen. Having lost my dad earlier in the year I know how hard it is to see a parent in declining health. Your mum is so lucky to have such a caring daughter and it is lovely that you have had the opportunity to spend so much time together while she has been living with you. I hope that you are now able to get some help to support you in caring for her. Always remember that your sewing friends are out here and happy to support and listen. xx

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Aw Jen, I wish I could give you and your mum a real life big hug 🤗 me and cyber mom send lots of love and are thinking of you. I hope you’re keeping well in yourself as I imagine you could be feeling tired and run down. xxxxxxxxx

    Liked by 1 person

  9. So sorry to hear all this, it must be an enormously stressful time for you. How wonderful though, that you’ve had extended time together. I’m sure I speak for us all when I say that we appreciate you sharing. It is hard when a blogger suddenly ‘disappears’ – it can feel like such a loss.

    Liked by 1 person

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